what to do

so my husband wants a boat ...again.Well i want to always give him what he wants....but i cant work + small disability=not enough for the boat. So u say how is this" what to do?" well let me share, my husband said 3 weeks ago that he wanted to sell his truck to pay off bills...now we cover all our bills but he wants to pay off a few....now he wants a boat....and so i dont know what to fight for, pay off bills or spend MORE money...Now almost dying i truly believe that u only live once so live it up...but i HATE fighting with my husband which this will be.....

in 2 years we pay off alot of bills......alot..... so i think we should wait till then.

so in this convo i ask what does he want, he says..i have u so i already have all i need.....yeah he can have whatever

no reason

There is no reason/anniversary to post this except to realize everyday is a gift...........

some fought for just one more breath last night so be soooooooooooo thankful for yours....
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B0Uusz4AJjg&feature=youtu.be

side effects

so some have asked about my side effects.....thank you and im sorry because they make me in awful mood...

soooooo moodyness
hotflashes
neauropathy
hotflashes
muscle cramps
hot flashes
some personal stuff i wont discuss on my blog
hot flashes
nightsweats
and did i mention hot flashes

its so not fun but im alive

luv him

i have known this boy and chose him almost 12 yrs ago....and daily he does something new to know why i chose him. We had a great day date yesterday. Our friends went the other day to the pier for lunch and it looked so nice, we copied....we laughed and laughed. Then we went to my cancer dr...then we went to the doughnut place....it was super yummy.....and then we went to Ikea....yes i walked ikea- not smooth but it was a super proud moment that i could still do it and that my husband still adores me and held me the whole time....

it was such a great day

no more surgery

lemme tell u back story so you get it.....ok i got Breast Cancer, the estrogen kind...i did chemo that didn't work, then a tram flap, different chemo, then radiation, then tamoxifen for at least  for 5 years. Normally people loose there period when u have chemo or on tamoxifen ..um not me....i guess im not normal......so my Dr. said lets try lupron on u.....which i already had during my multiple IVF's and it worked but the side effects are very not awesome and combined with the side effects of tamoxifen are not even kind of funny....so i decided that we are never having babies....unfortunately..... so lets remove my ovaries because then we can eliminate the lupron, because if i do this because my body wont produce estrogen. So i call my Dr. to do this and she asks to see me. I go in yesterday and she tells me, that the side effects with surgery are permanent and with drugs they arnt, so she is stopping my lupron....so no surgery. another surgery. nope which when u have had like 5 in two yrs, u dont want more. so this great news

what? u want to see the list of side effects....ok

here are the common side effects for tamoxifen

• Absent, missed, or irregular periods
• decrease in the amount of urine
• feeling of warmth
• menstrual changes
• noisy, rattling breathing
• redness of the face, neck, arms and occasionally, upper chest
• skin changes
• stopping of menstrual bleeding
• swelling of the fingers, hands, feet, or lower legs
• troubled breathing at rest
• weight gain or loss
• white or brownish vaginal discharge

common side effects of lupron

acne, increased growth of facial hair

breakthrough bleeding in a female child during the first 2 months of leuprolide treatment

dizziness, weakness, tired feeling

hot flashes, night sweats, chills, clammy skin

nausea, diarrhea, constipation, stomach pain

skin redness, itching, or scaling

joint or muscle pain

vaginal itching or discharge

breast swelling or tenderness

testicle pain

impotence, loss of interest in sex

depression, sleep problems (insomnia), memory problems; or

redness, burning, stinging, or pain where the shot was given

please note i dont suffer from testicular pain because i dont have them.............

so the last injection will last another month.